Get down.

I call today the #WorldClumsiestDay.

Q and I were crossing a street on our way to work where I noticed a massive billboard on the other end. So I looked at them commenting about some random thing that I can’t even remember now. Q was stuffing his mouth with a sandwich. A breakfast sandwich! Then I had this funny feeling about my feet. In a split second (while was I was blabbing about the billboard) I thought shit something’s weird is going to happen. In the next split second, my right feet started to get into this sliding feeling on the right edge of the shoe. My left feet subconsciously reacted to it and started to slightly slide to the left.

I didn’t mention, I was holding Q’s left hand. The sandwich was in Q’s right hand. His attention was obviously all on the sandwich, just as always. Food is a priority.

So I thought, man what is going on with my feet. They didn’t feel like MY feet. They were already disconnected from my brain. One second later, I lost control of my balance. And both legs start to mess up. And the feet slipped small steps, big steps, small steps, big steps. Time seemed to freeze at the moment and I remember thinking this is not good, but when will the slipping stop. The next thing I know, my bum was on the floor. My legs crossed. Jenny was down. My face faced 3 cars in front of me, and 3 other cars stopping diagonally on the other side. This is so embarrassing.

I heard Q cried out: OIIIII are you okay? His left hand clutched to my right arm, sandwich still in the other hand. My conscious turned to my arm being clutched and his voice. I thought do i look like OK? This is not OK. Typical people asking other people who are not OK if they are OK. ARGGGGGGHHHH.

Then I thought about my ‘audience’, drivers and passengers of the cars in front of me. Let’s not give them any more joy from witnessing this once-in-a-lifetime embarrassment of Jenny’s. Let’s pretend I’m cool enough to laugh at myself and my own adversity. Actually, I found the incident quite funny too. So I laughed about it, slowly got up. Q still clutching my hand, bread in his mouth mumbling something, looking very concerned. I said it’s alright, it doesn’t hurt. And we started to make a move from the accident area.

The green light has changed to the red one, flickering, sounding beep beep beep.

As we were running toward the other side, the wind! Argh the wind! Why was it so heavy this morning. It blew my hair in 360 degrees all directions. And my shoulder-length fringe was getting into my eyes. Talking about things happening at the right time, at the right place, NOT! I shook my head left and right, struggling to get the hair out, still smiling by the way. I’m sure I looked like a crazy cat having the time of my life on the street.

Finally, we reached the other side of the street. OMG. This better end right now. Mayhem!

Anyway, this is the closest .gif of my struggle this morning.


Not a very smooth start to the day. But that’s not all though.

I reached the office, went to the bathroom to straighten myself up and shake the embarrassment off. I pulled out the bb cream bottle to do some touch-ups. Slipped my hand and the bb cream bottom dropped to the floor. Ok no big deal.

Then I went to the kitchen to make breakfast. Dropped half of my avocado on the kitchen floor. Clumsiness got the better of me, both within 5 minutes.

Went out for a coffee with colleagues, I also accidentally pushed a tall chair to the floor. Man something’s got to me today.

Back to the office, at some point, I AGAIN!!! dropped my orange onto the kitchen floor!

May today also be known as #WorldFloorDay too.


a haiku about being late for food

Today we eat noodle
Why does it take so long?
It’s all ‘cos of Jenny.


I haven’t made much progress with my thesis recently.

Telling myself not to stress out. Then feeling guilty because I’m not stressed out. Then stressing out because I’m feeling guilty.


We had a question run in the team the other day "What’s your favourite TV series?"

The first few answers were pretty straightforward: Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, 13 Reasons Why, and so on.

Then came this person who said: I feel like I’m really bad a TV series because I don’t want TV a lot. But if I have to pick one, it will be ABC.

Then the next person: well I don’t want TV either but …

Then the n-th person: I often have TV series play in the background while I’m surfing the internet so I’m not actually watching. But I’ve heard it from my friends that ABC is good so I will probably check it out.

And I sat there, thinking how interesting it was that people were going the extra miles to explain their TV watching habits and as a result, make the name of the shows they would mention later becomes less important albeit it is what answers the questions. What makes it compulsory that they have to pick something to sound like a part of the conversation and acknowledge that it’s a force-pick. Why wouldn’t anyone just say "I don’t have any favourites" or "I don’t want to pick my favourites because …". Why do people going around the question, rather than addressing the question? What does it say about people giving names and no explanation, vs people giving explanations then some names of the series?

From my point of view, with that question, I was expecting short and specific answers. I just said ‘Breaking Bad’ and moved on, as to me that’s enough information to answer the tabled question. I was not asked if I watch TV, if I have TV, how often I watch TV, or is there any show that I’ve heard of and will want to watch.

However, there are people who expand the questions asked. They take it as an opportunity to open up about themselves. There are people who are interested in knowing more about others, so they don’t just listen, they probe and clarify and tease out more personal insights from the speaker. They are looking for some hints of preferences and personality traits from the answers. And they find the delight in finding this new information. Which is totally cool.

It then goes back to what’s the point of the question? Why is it asked in the first place? Does it mean to gather data or information (note there’s a difference between data and information)? What’s the context the question was asked? Why is it a question for a crowd, but not in a one-on-one? Was it asked in a way that everybody can have the same understanding and interpretation? Is it a compulsory question? Can there be a No answer? What people who answer the question want the listener to know about them through their answers?

Some many questions for a question.


27 July, 2017 13:07

Me hand-washing my plates after lunch.

Colleague A: you don’t use the dishwasher?
Me: Nope, I don’t believe in it.
Colleague A: you think it conspires some theories?
Colleague B: it used to be my job for a while. I sat in there.

* * *

Me: how tall are you?
Colleague: 6"2′
Me looking up what 6"2′ is in cm: ah 1.93. Let me tell my husband.
Colleague: are you guys planning to kidnap me? Let me know so I can say goodbye to my friends.

open & honest

We had a mini discussion at work today about openness and honesty – do both words mean the same?

I think that they are not. Openness and Honesty bear different meanings and implications. Openness implies the accessibility to information, while Honesty refers to reflecting what’s known to be true.

An example: I can be honest and tell you how terrible the day has been, but if I choose not to tell you because of certain reasons (not worth your time and attention, or by telling you it will only make me feel more terrible), it doesn’t mean that I’m not honest.

Some of my colleagues think they mean the same thing. "That’s why you say an open and honest conversation." Why do you need to use both words in a sentence if they refer to the same thing? Have you heard someone saying "this book is nice, great, and fantastic"? "It both means transparency." Hmm, you are using a new word to neutralise the meanings of these two words. "Those are only semantics right?" Nahhh darling, this is about your personal take, what Openness and Honesty mean to you and me. It’s about having a shared and common understanding of our vocabulary so our expectations are aligned.

When you say you expect honesty from you, you would think that it includes openness, and vice versa. So I have to tell you every single time how terrible my day goes.

When I say I expect honesty from you, I expect you to call A an A. When I say I expect openness from you, I expect you to tell me how many As you’ve got.

See the difference?

An honest conversation. Imagined.

IMG_4027 (1).jpg

– I don’t appreciate being talked to that way.
– Why?
– You are implying that I changed my mind arbitrarily.
– Well, that’s exactly what I think. Remember a few weeks ago, you didn’t like that idea and wanted to not proceed with it at all? Then someone talked to you and you weren’t quite happy because she challenged your objective. You went with the idea in the end after that talk. Now you say this is a good idea. That gives me the impression that you changed your mind arbitrarily. I stuck with this idea from the beginning. I said I’m aware of the pros and cons, but I’m willing to take the risks because I can see the risks are something I can manage. I’m not surprised with how this idea turns out to be now. It is what I foresaw it would be. And I’ve worked really hard to make sure we are on track. I’m glad that you have acknowledged how everything works out now; however, from where I stand, I see there’s an 180-degree of opinion change on your end.
– But the decision to go with the idea was still mine, right? It was me who made the final call that we should go with it. It was the right one.
– That was ultimately your call, as in any other decision in this place, isn’t it? You have to sign off on everything.
– I’m just very annoyed with the way you said it.
– I can’t help you control your own emotions. Do you need a moment?

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Why am I doing Smart Seeds?


Someone asked me about that after he learnt that I’m currently working full time and doing a master’s degree part time, “Why are you also doing this (Smart Seeds)?”. I felt being put on the spot at that moment so I gave a really lame answer.

Now at this very wee hour, with the luxury of a quiet late night, I contemplate this question “Why am I doing Smart Seeds?”. Here’s what I reckon:

  • I have never taken part in an innovation programme of this scale so I want to experience it.
  • This is going to give me the experience of
    • stepping outside of my comfort zone,
    • working on something that’s bigger than me and my capability,
    • getting to work with a bunch of people in other industries that I would not otherwise have a chance to work with,
    • getting to learn from other industries through working on a project which of course, I would not otherwise have any chance to.
  • Again, an opportunity like this is not popping up often enough.
  • I put my time and thoughts into the application, of course, I will follow it through upon being selected.
  • This gives me a chance to be “out of the office” and have a wider perspective.